Brian Burns, LMFT

Worst Advice I have received and ultimately destroyed my marriage!! I went to Brian to seek counseling for me and my ex. We had our normal relationship issues I was seeking to get help and guidance. When my ex told me we needed to take a break I was shattered. At the same time my ex started hanging out with an old guy friend (who is divorced and single with a kid the same age as my oldest). Not great for a marriage that your trying to repair. I was uncomfortable with this new friendship and said I was unable to focus on our issues with our relationship while this was going on. Dinner dates, shopping trips, hanging out at each others houses (while I'm also away on trips), late night bars while home watching the kids. He told her by ending the friendship it would be putting here back in my box of requirements and not letting her be her own individual. He told me I should find a way to be trusting and that we should all be able to have a healthy relationship and friendship because its important to her. This went on for a course of 3 years and am now divorced this past august. To no surprise they are playing house with my kids, have the same custody schedule so they have kids on same days as well as same days off, and she calls him her boyfriend and that they are just now sleeping together. This was going on for 3 years as I suspected and I went to seek marriage advice and was hoping someone would explain how if in fact you wanted to work on our marriage this would not be acceptable or good for any relationship for that matter. She claimed even a professional supported it so as I should. I stopped seeing him. The whole process has mentally messed me up so bad and after seeing two additional therapist am seeing how wrong and bad advice it was. I lost my wife, half my kids lives, and financially. I cant blame my marriage on him but can on this matter and advice he gave that didn't allow me a fair chance. I put my trust in him and my life

Brian patronized and belittled me when my ex and I were seeking help developing our parenting plan. He sided - which a parental advisor is never to do as a neutral party-with my ex and said to me, "This is what happens when you allow a woman too much time on her hands," pertaining to my career. I was shocked. Little did he know I was seeking to go into the military. He treated me with such disrespect, taking things back into the ultra conservative cult that I also divorced along with my ex. I couldn't believe I was going to pay this person to help me with my most beautiful lives on the planet - my kids. Coercion, adherence to a male-dominated and mysogynistic ideal and practicing according to those beliefs is confounding and obstructing your ability to function as a neutral party in a divorce. Never again. I will never uphold this type of treatment of any human, especially a minority who has made it against all odds, and seeks help of a professional during their vulnerability.